Romance RP

(Man, doesn't Ryan remember any of this when he awakens? XD)

Although Lycoris was feeling quite fearful herself, she could feel Ryan's body shaking as though he were having a nightmare. Momentarily forgetting about everything, putting top priority to Ryan's well-being and peace of mind, she wrapped her arms around him and hugged him close to her until their noses almost touched, quietly whispering,

"I-I am sorry. Please calm down. I won't leave you. But calm down, please."

(lol  Nope, apparently he doesn't.  He only remembers if he had a happy dream or a nightmare although no details.  XD)

Ryan took deep breaths and his body gradually stopped shaking.  Returning her hug, the warm smile on his face returned and he replied,

"I love you, Lycoris.  I'll always love you."

His head was on her shoulder as he continued to sleep peacefully.

(lol I see. Lycoris won't be able to ignore things easily this time though. XD)

Lycoris was relieved as Ryan seemed calmer and at peace but as he murmured words of love to her once more, her confusion and fears returned. Ryan was in love with her but he either wasn't aware of it or was but continued to hide it. And she-she wasn't in love with him. Yes, she had to tell herself that over and over again. She couldn't betray Alex. She couldn't try to take Ryan away from Lisianthus. She had to shut out whatever feelings she had inside of her for Ryan.

How could she just spend time with Ryan so normally and intimately as before, after knowing this?

(lol  I see.  XD)

A little later, Ryan finally woke up and seeing that Lycoris was already awake, he smiled softly at her and said,

"Hi, Lycoris.  Did you have a good nap?  I'm sorry I took so long in waking up but at least we can still enjoy the rest of the afternoon, right?"

He had a happy expression on his face, almost as though he never had the dream or nightmare.

Lycoris looked a bit startled as Ryan woke up and addressed her, not sure what to say. His tone clearly indicated that he was unaware of anything of what was happening a little ago but just how could she behave after that?

Knowing she to reply, she quietly said, "Hey, Ryan. Yes, I had a good nap and I hope you had a good rest as well."

She was quite distracted but tried to compose herself.

Ryan looked a little thoughtful and replied, "Well, I think it was ok.  I don't remember but all I know is that I had this dream that turned into a horrible nightmare and then it went back to a happy dream.  But I suppose it's normal that I wouldn't remember the details.  Most people don't remember what their dreams are about."

He looked thoughtfully at Lycoris and asked, "Did you have any dreams, my angel?"

Lycoris shook her head slowly but didn't know what to do. She thought about telling Ryan again about the contents of his dream but what good was that if he would just deny it and then have the same dream again the next time he fell asleep?

She didn't say anything, lost in her own thoughts.

Ryan couldn't help but observe Lycoris' behavior and after a moment of thinking, he gently asked,

"What's wrong, Lycoris?  You seem distracted...Um, I hope I didn't have any strange dreams again?  If I did, I'm really sorry."

Lycoris became more attentive as Ryan brought up having strange dreams again and mustering enough courage, she quietly asked,

"Ryan, is it possible for somebody to be in love with another without realizing it?"

Ryan wondered why Lycoris was asking this question while avoiding answer his.  However, he didn't think too much about it and replied,

"I think it is.  For example, if a guy and a girl are best friends, they'll spend lots of time together and slowly over time, it's possible for them to develop deeper feelings for each other without realizing it.  And even if they do realize it, they may not say anything because they don't want to fear getting rejected."

He looked curiously at Lycoris, wondering what she was thinking.

Lycoris sighed inwardly, for this answer didn't help her, and it only confused her more, whether Ryan was in love with her without realizing it. No, she was almost sure Ryan was in love with her from his dreams but he either hid it or really wasn't aware of it.

She wanted to tell him of his dreams but feared that he would conclude what she thought, which was quite direct, and could make things quite embarrassing for both of them.

Ryan observed how quiet Lycoris was and gently replied,

"Was this not the answer you were looking for?  I'm sorry I couldn't be of more help."

His face showed one of pure confusion, as he had no idea what had happened while he slept.

Lycoris shook her head and replied, "No, that's not it. Umm, it's just that . . . "

She almost told him directly but couldn't bring herself to, and instead, she quietly asked, "Ryan, you still love Sia very much, right? You only think of her, and when you think of the future, you can only see her there, right?"

Ryan wanted to immediately answer yes but he hesitated, having to think over the answer.  After a moment, he nodded and replied,

"Yeah, I still do.  I mean, I haven't agreed with her actions recently but that doesn't mean I don't love her any less."

Ryan's answer didn't soothe Lycoris very much, for despite it being what she wished for, she felt the hesitation that was there for a moment. Deciding that going with that line of questions would go nowhere, she smiled a bit and quietly replied,

"That's good to hear. I want you two to be the happiest ever for all the time. You should get married, rule the gods' world, have a lot of children . . . and no one should ever come between you two."

Now Ryan knew that something had happened while he slept, as he could clearly tell from Lycoris' tone.  Reaching out to touch her hands, he gently asked,

"What's the matter, Lycoris?  Did something happen while I slept?  You know you can tell me anything."

(Getting sleepy here so I'll go head off to bed now.  I have work tomorrow but I'll make a post before I go.  Anyway, nite, nite, Love.  ^^)

(Nite, nite, phoenix. ^^)

Lycoris wanted to continue hiding the matter, for it really brought her a lot of stress to even think about it, but she couldn't keep it inside her any longer, and tearfully, she replied quietly,

"You-you were having that dream again . . . Speaking of how you are in love with me and you want the rest of your future to be with me. I-I tried telling you in your sleep that you were just confused but you were insistent that it was me you loved and you-you even said you didn't love Sia anymore . . . When I said it was wrong, you-you panicked and started having that nightmare. It was only when I said I wouldn't leave you that started calming down again. I-I can't tell if it was just confusion anymore. I-I don't know what to think. I am sorry. I-I am so sorry."

She didn't even know what she was apologizing for, but she felt that the whole situation was wrong, that she was too confused.

Ryan was alarmed as Lycoris explained what happened and reaching out to hug her, he gently replied,

"I'm so sorry, Lycoris.  You're upset because I had weird dreams again.  You shouldn't be apologizing.  I-I don't know what's wrong with me.  I care about you very much but I know I'm in love with Sia and want to marry her."

He buried his face in Lycoris' shoulder, ashamed of himself.

(I'll be going to work in a bit but I'll be back this evening so I can post more then.  ^^)

(Take your time. ^^)

Lycoris didn't feel much better after Ryan's response, for he was clearly unaware of how he felt and was probably as confused as she was, and there was still the likely chance that he was in love with her. She wanted to point it out, to say that he could be in love with her and that was why he had such dreams, but she couldn't bring herself to say such a thing.

Nevertheless, she didn't like feeling the shame in Ryan's voice or gesture, for despite her conflicted feelings, she still couldn't stand knowing he was like that. So returning the hug gently, she replied quietly,

"Please don't apologize. It-it isn't your fault. You can't help what you dream, right? It-it's alright."

(Back and free now.  ^^)

Ryan could tell by Lycoris' reply that she wasn't feeling completely at ease with his reply.  Getting an idea, he replied,

"You know, I have an idea that might solve things.  When we go to sleep tonight, I'll cast a spell on myself so that I won't have any dreams.  That way, things won't be confusing for either of us."

(Welcome back. ^^)

Lycoris didn't know whether to agree or not, but she thought although this might ease the confusion, it didn't explain at all why Ryan had such dreams in the first place and it wouldn't erase any feelings he might be developing for her.

So deciding to leave the matter to him, she replied, "It's your mind, Ryan. That-that's your decision to make."

(Thanks.  ^^)

Ryan was confused as to why Lycoris neither agreed or disagreed with using the spell but he didn't want to press the matter with her.  Deciding that he wanted to ease things between them as much as possible, he replied,

"In that case, I'll use the spell before I go to sleep from now on.  That way, there won't be any more awkwardness between us."

He paused for a moment and then tentatively asked, "Do you feel uncomfortable around me, Lycoris?"

Lycoris was a little surprised by Ryan's question and it took her a moment to reply, but deciding to be honest, she replied quietly,

"It's not that but I-I am confused . . . I just want things cleared. One-one doesn't tend to have dreams out of the blue, right? Especially not twice. It-it was like the sleeping Ryan is completely a different person from the Ryan who's awake. They both talked to me but in completely different ways and I-I don't know what to think. If-if it's true that you are . . . "

She trailed off, the courage she had mustered to talk ending right there, and she hung her head, not sure what to say any longer.

As Lycoris trailed off, Ryan could see where Lycoris' line of thinking was going and he gently replied,

"I think I understand.  I don't know what to make of me when I'm asleep.  I really don't remember what I dream about but I never want you to feel uneasy around me.  Listen-I know that you don't have any romantic feelings for me, right?  You're married to Alex and you'll always stay faithful to him."

(Man, Ryan isn't even considering the possibility that he could be in love with Lycoris. XD)

Lycoris was a bit relieved as Ryan seemed understanding of her thoughts and nodding, she replied,

"Yes, that's true. You're my dear brother, Ryan, and I love you but-but there's no romance between us and there mustn't be. And you-you're engaged to Sia and you still love her very much, right?"